First and foremost, the new year has been great for me!
It started off with a substitute teaching gig that totally showed me that I don't want to me a teacher, which is great to know now, instead of after I've entered the program. I love the population I work with, and can't see myself anywhere else. So I'm sure I could be a totally awesome teacher for typical public school kids, but then I wouldn't be using my talents to their fullest potential. I speak the same language as ED kiddos...we just get each other. Anyways, it was super crazy, did it for 6 weeks (three of those actually being at the end of 2013) and long story short...glad I learned my lesson sooner rather than later and I have a new found respect for Special Needs teachers! Madness on top of madness, but I can't say I didn't have fun.
I finally understand! So, should I teach? Will the questions ever stop?!
As far as what lies ahead in my future now, I remain uncertain. But I know with 213% of my heart that I was born and put on this good earth to help this population, I'm just not sure which avenue that will be done in. I remain hopeful though, and I try to take it easy most days...I'm not even a quarter of a century old yet! And I love what I do now! So...for now, I am in a good place. That doesn't mean it isn't stressful!!! But I do wake up every single day filled with purpose. I feel so grateful to have a job that makes me feel good, and in the end I'm helping the kids, and the kids are helping me.
...or at least that is how I like to think of it when the kiddos start driving the bus to crazy-town!
Another happy, fun thing I've been doing this year is working out. I've finally settled into a good routine and the working out and eating healthy isn't so much of a challenge anymore! It's not a hurdle I have to jump every day. I meet them with confidence! Actually, I can tell it is becoming a lifestyle because my actual preferences are changing! When I don't get my sweat on, I feel different. When I don't eat a balanced plate filled with healthy choices, I feel different. And the different feeling isn't good! It's heavy, slow, and exhausted really. But I like it!
What I am most excited about is that I am:
These are all things that are different about me, and they didn't happen over night (just like everyone said it wouldn't happen). So, I'm embarking on a new fitness journey. I consider myself fairly spiritual and holistic and I feel like my food should reflect that. And since my body is my temple, that should also reflect the spirit of my soul. Did that even make sense to anyone who isn't me? Do I care? :-) My favorite part about all of this is that I am doing it for me. It makes me feel good! And it's going to benefit me now and later. You're welcome, future kids.
- learning about new foods that, turns out, I L-O-V-E!
- literally craving exercise.
- learning about my body
- creating a lifestyle that can endure past laziness and youth
- willing to pay for my sweet tooth in the gym
I don't think I'll ever give up a mean burger, and I know I can never truly give up the cream of ice...but I can make better choices more often, so when I do go off the grid, I don't have to feel guilty and can enjoy it...and I can enjoy working it off!
I would love to preach this amazingness to everyone I love so that they could all live long and prosper, but I know it isn't for everyone, and I know it's ok. It took me quite some time to realize that I even needed to make a change! I didn't know that if I did I would legitimately feel SO different...and everyone comes to it on their own, just like spirituality (hmmm, did things just come in full circle there?).
BUUUUTTTT, if you are looking for some inspiration, my health coach is fantastic. Super positive and completely understanding that EVERYONE is on their own path. I didn't know where to go after I figured out I enjoyed veggies, and she helped me amp up my food game, which in turn kicked up my work outs since suddenly, I had energy to do them more intensely and more often! She's wonderful, and also is great with self-help and most importantly self-love. Whenever I am feeling down, I just read one of her entries and it's like BAM! Self-love tank is FULL.
As far as workouts go, to be honest, I have some legit gym anxiety. I'm super insecure about going in there and not knowing what the heck I'm doing! But luckily for me, I have decided to break my comfort zone and asked a friend for help. They are so happy to share their knowledge and it makes me really excited to give it a try...now I just have to go do it. :-) So obviously, my fitness journey didn't start at the gym, it started at home, with YouTube videos. Judge if you wish, but it got me started and I still do them to this day. It's a great convenience to be able to workout at home and not have to travel anywhere! I started with Pilates because, let's face it, if a Princess had to workout, she would probably do Pilates. So it only made sense for me to do Pilates! I found Blogilates on YouTube and it turns out she has a whole website, and just like my healthy coach she is super inspiring and positive! Granted, her perky attitude sometimes makes my post-work "I have had little kids yell at me all day long, kick walls, throw chairs, and spit on me" state of mind a little annoyed, I found that it actually doesn't bother me too much, Her passion for Pilates just shines through, and I can't help but feel good at the end of her workouts! I've been trying to go to Pilates classes as well lately and if you're local a great Pilates studio I found is StudioV. Very welcoming staff, and not once since going to take a variety of their classes have I felt judged! (O.K. maybe once during a TRX class, but I'm sure that was just in my mind!) (Also, I love their Zumba class!). At home, I also like the Fitness Blender workouts! Not as perky as my Pilates chick, and it's helping me get into other TYPES of workouts, which is great! Love them!
I'm sure this is what I look like half the time but, M-Badger don't care!
Overall, the year so far has been full of changes. A lot of rebirth, especially in my fitness and health life...but I'm diggin' it big time! It's a challenge for sure some days, and I know I am always going to have those kinds of days. But I am so happy I decided to take a step outside of my comfort zone, because now I have the courage to venture even further! I'm happy, healthy, and most importantly growing. Hope 2014 is just as wonderful for all of you!
xoxo,
M.
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